Question by VENTI: I am 23, gay. My parents say I shouldn’t go back to study. Any thoughts?
#THANKS FOR SPENDING A FEW MINUTES TO READ MY QUESTION. I REALLY NEED YOUR HELP AND APPRECIATE YOUR PATIENCE ####

I am 23, male. I have been studied science in an Australian university for 1 year. My parents want me to be a biological scientist but I am not interested in science at all. I didn’t do well and finaIly I droped out from the course . My university counsellor suggest me to go back to Hong Kong (my hometown) and discover my own interest before I go back to study in Australia. Back in Hong Kong, I am living with my parents and I share the rent with them. The rent is about US$ 900 per month. Dad, mum and I pay US$ 300 each. My 20-year-old younger sister lives with us as well.

I have come out to my friends in Australia but never come out to parents yet. My parents are very homophobic. I am afraid they’ll find out and reject me. I face their bad words everyday becaue of my academic failure, I went back to my room and closed the door and cried. Then sister say I am not allowed to close my room’s door. ” You need to have your room door opened all the time, including when you are crying. What’s the point of closing the d*mn door? Have you ever considered my feelings?” They say” Listen to *your sister, you loser” My parents also say ” Why can’t you get along with us well? If you can’t get along with us well, it means you can’t get along with your schoolmates and colleagues as well. You are a big loser !” My sister, who is studying to be a counsellor, says ” Why are you so defensive about yourself? Why don’t you compromise with My sister said , ” You’re so defensive about yourelf therefore no counsellor on Earth can help you. ”

I also said , ” I dropped out from science course because I have no interest in it at all. Mum, My dream is to be an successful accountant, not a scientist .”

Question 1) Which one do you think is better? Get my accounting degree in Australia or work full-time in Hong Kong ? ” You are 23 year old already. ” My mum said ” If you study full-time in Australia for 3 more years , it mean you will lose 3 years of work experience. When you graduate with an accounting degree at the age of 26, no one will hire you again because you are 2 to 3 years older than an average univesity graduate. And you don’t have much full-time job experience . You will not able to find a good job because employers tend to employ younger people.” However, I really wanna go to Australia , do my favourite course and stay away from my homophobic parents . Will I be less competitive in the job market after 3 years ( because my graduate age is 26 , which is 2 to 3 years older than an average graduate ) ?

##Advantages of going back to study in AUSTRALIA##

1)Away from homophobic parents , more freedom to
express my sexuality (e.g. Dating guys, develop
my own interest e,g, learn how
to drive and DJing ) ( I can’t do this in HONG Kong because
my mum opposes me to learn
how to drive and DJing. She lost
temper to me because I enrol in
a driving and Club DJing course )
In addition , I can
receive mental
supporting from
gay-friendly friends
Homophobic parents
will be 8800 km away and won’t be
able to gay-bash me

2) Better resume after graduation ( with a college degree!)

3) Able to work part-time between university semester
in Australia ( p.s. However, my mum say any job during
school holiday is USELESS.She says they are not long-term job
so that are USELESS, won’t add color to my resume)

4) Able to apply Permanent residency in Australia after graduation ( IF I wanna keep staying away from homophobic parents after graduation)
Then I can keep working and staying with my cute boyfriend Then I plan to apply civil co-partnership with my boyfriend in Australia even my homophobic parent complain in Hong Kong

###Disdavantages of going back to Australia:

1) My mum says I will be 26 years old
when graduation, which is 3-4 years older
than an average fresh graduate . My mum says
employers tend to hire younger job applicants. I will be a bit old to be hired .I will not able to find a good job even though I am a degree holder
Therefore, she says going to Australia to study is USELESS

2) Highest living cost in Australia while tudying

3) My mum says she is not sure I can graduate sucessfully een if I am self-confident

###Advantage of staying in Hong Kong and work

1) Lower living standard comapred to Australia
2) Able to work full-time and study part-time ( However, my mum discourage me to do any kind of study if I stary in HK)
3) My mum says I wil be more compeitive if I choose to work full-time in the next several years even without a degree. She says working experience is MORE important than university degree

###Disadvantages of staying in Hong Kong

1) Living with controlling, homophobic parents
( unable to fully develop yourself, unable to learn Club DJing and driving as a hobby, definitely be gay-bashed and verbally abusesd all the time
###LAST QUESTION ####

My sister says she will keep posting Facebook message , saying she had a quarrel with me. ” I want all your Facebook friends know you have a poor relationhip with your sister. ”

If you were me, how will you tackle this problem?

Best answer:

Answer by Cia
tl;dr

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